the classic sleep positions of my carter

a. hands crossed evenly behind the head

b. complete and utter blanket suffocation...lol

My NEW Find...

so as fun as it is to drive around and be silly with kindra, it can get a bit boring. i made some phone calls and discovered this. i was so excited!!! (even though it looks like i am floating shoeless, i'm not. thin and tan sandals. promise!)

i thought that i had strong abs until i tried this cart out!?! no really. it is so hard....

LOOK how hard that i am concenting! LOL! it's seriously intense!

xoxo

Spirit Week...

wear "all green" day...

wear "crazy socks" day...

wear "backwards clothes" day...

wear a "jersey" day...

"crazy hair" day...

wear a "crazy hat" day...

Keeping It Real...

i have so many things that are swirling around in my brain. so many things that it can be quite confusing. things that i don't understand. it's time for me to write on my blog...

let's start with last weekend. it was both horrible and wonderful at the same time.

we took the kids up to logan, utah so that we could go to the byu/utah state football game. big mistake. HUGE! (name that movie line) the stadium was not accessible at all, NOT AT ALL, and the game was heart wrenching. (another post for another day)

because carter is carter, whenever something is new or exciting it totally messes him up. he acts out, he is disobedient, he is defiant, he is horrible beyond horrible. i was dying at the game. counting down the seconds until it would be over. ignoring all of the stares that most were giving. "oh my. can you imagine? that poor lady, being in a wheelchair, trying to control her disrespectful son". yes. this is what i heard. i hate that carter does not "look the part" because people just assume he is a child who has just not been mannered well. promise. so not the case. and i hate when people give me the "feel bad look" and i hate when people make me feel like i should feel sorry for myself...when i don't. it's like i want to yell at them. tell them all of the things that i do, that we do. i hate ignorance!

after the game we went to the motel which was a perfect diamond in the rough. carter of course was great because it felt calm and normal. we had fun watching a night cartoon of phineas and ferb and i felt calm again. i felt safe. being with those who love me for me and see the qualities that i possess.

the next day we went up to the logan lds temple which was gorgeous and played with our new nerf guns that grandma had bought them. they couldn't wait! we had fun running around the park. we got hungry and found this place. great place. we headed home but not before we went here. we had a great time and i loved seeing the kids actually get excited and interested about learning. we left and got home right in time for this, which is exactly what i needed to bring me back to reality. back to my refuge. thank goodness but mentally i was done. the kids picked a movie, put on the pj's, and to their rooms they went. i was done.

on the way home, i began to reflect on things. on my life. on the way things have played out.

1. i am sure beyond sure that my love life is how it's suppose to be. though i wanted it to be a
different way back then, i see how that could not have been. that person would not have had the patience to deal---

2. don't judge. we all do what we can. oh yeah. and i wish i could stand, walk so that i could show off my abs, have an awesome body, and be 100% in style and chic. no really. i hate it and hate feeling like this!---

3. honesty. why can't we just all be honest with each other about how difficult life really can be? it would make things so much easier, not about "keeping up with the jones". honestly, i swear that i still don't know what i'm doing. how can i possibly be a mom???---

4. i want normal. what is normal? i don't know but normal is boring, right?!---

5. i love to laugh. i need to laugh. it calms my soul---

6. service. i love to serve. i need my random service projects. it quickens my spirit, is so FUN, and brings me joy!---

7. i don't understand why my kids "came" to me but i know that it's how i want it to be---

8. i hate regret---

9. i love my home and my "silky". not my house but my home. it is my refuge and our "safe house"---

10. i love my kids, my family, our spirituality, and our beliefs---

11. i love that my kindra went in to "little caesars pizza", ordered, and bought a pizza all by herself. she helps me out sooooo much---

12. i love my friends...ALOT---

13. i need my adventures and though i've been accused of running away from life...fine. i'm guilty.(don't judge) but they keep me sane so sorry. they're staying put---

14. when the trust is broken, even once, it's nearly impossible to ever fully gain it back and when the trust is gone, what's left?

anyway, i've rambled on too long now but just one of those venting and "real" posts that i occasionally make to keep me honest. :)

The Cave Attempt...

Trevor decided to see if he could do and handle a beard...lol. Nope. It's gone :)

And YES. We actually "hiked...rolled" up the trail as long as we could meaning my arms and/0r Trevor's back pushing muscles could handle it. And fine. It didn't last too long...lol. And YES. We were hysterically laughing the entire time. We got the best looks like "What the fetch are they doing? Why are they this crazy???" Yes. Good times :)

More fun times up the canyon! xoxo

One Of My Hells On Earth...

Grandpa & Grammy Corbridge really wanted to take the kids to the Salt Lake County Fair this year. Though I loath these types of events I agreed. Also seeing that I took the kids last year with my parents and actually had a good time, I figured that we could do it again.
What what I thinking??? My first sign of what was in store should have been when I discovered that only 1 of my sandals had made the trip up so I had to go in shoeless. Yes. So embarrassed though my jeans were long enough to hide the fact but still. Next, when we went to pay to get in we were told that we had come on the ONLY evening that KIDS GOT IN FREE! Yes, I will be polite with the generalizations but let's just say that EVERYONE AND THEIR DOGS were there. Enough said.

One of Carter's loves...John Deere

Kindra's love...the horse who she made sure to find out his name. Quote---"Mom, it's like Nephi Jesus Nephi!" Lol....

She almost got her fingers bit off here. Seriously I am paranoid about these animals not knowing where they've been and the germs!?!

So earlier that day I had made sure that I told Trevor that the sooner we left, the sooner we could come home. He agreed. We left at 5pm so I assumed that we would be home around 8pm. When I'd gone with my parents we went, we walked, hit up a ride, took some pics, and left. We had been there long enough to have not gone over "the limit of time" and we had been there for about 1.5hrs. Let's be honest. You've seen one pig, cow, sheep, carni ride, you've seen them all.
Let's just say that the Corbridge family is a bit different than the Terry family and I'm not saying that's necessarily a bad thing, just a different thing. (but I do like the Terry thing a lot better when it comes to Fair and Carnival time limits...lol) We were there FOREVER!!! We saw EVERYTHING and they wanted to do ANYTHING that they felt would give them the FAIR EXPERIENCE. The thing is that my kids don't really care that much. Come on. I've trained them in my traditions...lol
By the time that we finally left, after some words being exchanged between Trevor and I, after I was giving a "junk shot" by one of the workers who lifted his leg up, placing it on the counter, which opened his shorts up, giving my eyes a tunnel view right down to the "privates", after losing the car in the parking lot, after a trip to the North Temple ghetto drug deal going down Mcdonalds, and after a inner mental breakdown, we got home at 11pm.
6 HOURS AT THE FAIR??? 6 HOURS AT THE FAIR??? TO ME, THAT EQUALS HELL!!!
I know. I know. I am so selfish, huh? But sorry. I'm just being honest and it's really because I know how long that my kids can be at "these things" before trouble begins but whatever. We did it. The kids did have fun. The next day I woke up laughing at myself, how anal I had been but again, still. 6 HOURS AT THE FAIR??? Let's just say that the next time this event is planned, I'm making an executive decision and WILL BE STAYING HOME! hehehe ;)